Sunday, April 6, 2014

Oh, the irony!

Having an invisible illness like Hashimoto's thyroiditis--hypothyroidism--makes for a very isolated existence. Thyroid disease affects its victims in some pretty profound ways, most of which are not very obvious to everyone else. Unfortunately for those of us living with thyroid disease, particularly hypothyroidism, the symptoms that people can see are physical, such as weight gain (accompanied by the inability to lose weight), and extreme fatigue (often erroneously interpreted as laziness). Another extremely common symptom is "brain fog," or confusion, loss of memory, etc (all of which can trigger assumptions ranging from drunkenness to stroke).

When people, even well-meaning people, offer advice on how to manage our illness, it's difficult to be nice. It's really hard to hear things like "oh you just need to exercise more," or "maybe you should eat better." Because every single second of the day, we feel like we've been run over by a truck, and let me tell you, if there was a way to cure this disease, I would be the FIRST in line!

I recently came across an article that claimed to offer "essential" tips for losing weight with hypothyroidism. As I mentioned, I am ever on the lookout for something--anything--that will work to make me feel better, so naturally I dove right in. I'm torn about linking to the article (you can find the article here), since there is nothing inherently wrong with the advice offered, however the bitterly emotional side of my brain wants to rant and rave about the simplicity of it all. So, in an effort to (1) let other hypothyroid sufferers know they are not alone, and (2) help family and friends have a better idea of our desire, effort, and failure to get better, here are my responses to the advice I got so fired up about.

Tip 1: Avoid eating artificial sweeteners

So, I have epilepsy (woohoo on top of everything else, my brain gets twitchy too!), and artificial sweeteners are a BIG no-no anyway. Plus, they taste weird. Like, really weird. And leave an odd metallic aftertaste in my mouth. Even "natural" sweeteners such as stevia bother me, so it's cane sugar for me baby! But there are those out there who have turned to zero calorie sweeteners, likely in an attempt to lose weight, and now are hooked. They might as well be addicts. Obviously, I am biased against them, but here is an interesting article to get you started about thinking about the effects of artificial sweeteners. Finding a solution to the wickedly sharp sweet tooth is a tricky one at best, and pretty damn hard when you have overwhelming appetite cravings due to your illness.

Tip 2: Eat more organic vegetables and fruits

Well, naturally. But if you're like me, you swing between these wild opposites of never being hungry, or craving the worst kinds of foods. And what's more, a blanket statement like this is really not very helpful since there are many known aggravators of hypothyroid symptoms that most people actually associate with healthy options. Broccoli, kale, cabbage, almonds, peanuts, soybeans, grapes, and strawberries are best to be avoided by someone with hypothyroidism. Ironic, isn't it? Eating healthy could, in fact, make me sicker.

Tip 3: Minimize consumption of caffeine

Haha. Right. No really, some days, I can ONLY get out of bed because I know a cup of coffee is waiting for me. And I don't mean like the way you see on commercials or in movies, I mean it is literally the only thing that I know will stop me from crawling back to bed an hour after I get up like the walking dead. The cruelty of caffeine for someone with hypothyroidism is that the extreme fatigue we deal with makes the dependence on a stimulant like caffeine the only way we can manage to impersonate a regular person, but this disease often accompanies damage to the adrenal glands, which are the great little tortilla shaped glands perched on top of the kidneys that are responsible for the boost of adrenaline involved in the fight or flight response. Too much stimulation (such as constant stress or overuse of caffeine) strains the adrenals, and they can't function adequately anymore. So, class, hypothyroidism=chronic fatigue. Chronic fatigue=dependence on caffeine to function. Dependence on caffeine=damaged adrenals. Damaged adrenals=even greater fatigue. Can you see the nasty cycle here? I KNOW it's bad for me, but many days, it's the only energy I have.

Tip 4: Get sufficient sleep

Oh hey, did I mention that ANOTHER common symptom of thyroid disease is disrupted sleep patterns? That means, for me, that I am practically a zombie for most of the morning. I get a teeny boost of energy around ten or eleven in the morning (often thanks to my morning coffee--see tip 3 above), and then around three I feel like I need to use toothpicks to hold my eyelids open like in old-timey cartoons. Round about eight I get FATIGUED--as in, dead on my feet, barely functioning cognitively, don't bother talking to me because I'm hardly coherent exhausted. If I manage to (or must) make it to nine, then BAM my brain clicks on, and I'm revving like a race car. Go go go, zoom zoom zoom, I'm buzzing like an angry beehive. This lasts from anywhere between nine-ish and four in the morning. Then I fall into a fitful sleep, where I wake up every hour on the hour. Then I get up at six to get my family ready for the morning, and start it all over again. I would give just about anything for a decent night's sleep.

Tip 5: Drink lots of water

Sounds simple enough. And to be fair, it seems like everyone is supposed to be drinking more water, no matter what state their health is in. One of the most insidious secrets of modern society--from a health standpoint--is the prevalence of fluoride in drinking water. Even fancy-schmancy bottled water regularly has fluoride in it. Contrary to what many people have been led to believe, this soluble salt is found in water sources both naturally as calcium fluoride, and artificially as sodium fluoride--which is what is usually added to drinking water, and happens to be produced as a byproduct of nuclear, aluminum, and fertilizer industries--and is not nearly as safe as we've been told. Fluoride has an especially damaging effect on the endocrine system, and has actually been used as a treatment to decrease thyroid function historically for hyperthyroid patients. As a result, "drinking more water," while obviously well-intentioned, can have a most unwanted effect on the overall thyroid health of someone with thyroid disease. Well, crap.

Okay, okay, okay, if you are still with me, you deserve a cookie and some milk, or maybe even a stiff drink. I don't like reading uber-negative shit and I'm sure you don't either. What I really should be trying to emphasize here is that not everyone responds to treatment equally, not everyone can follow "these simple steps" and get better, and its critically important to educate yourself--REALLY educate yourself because you must be your own best advocate--so that you can determine what treatments are best for you.

I don't like being looked at like another fat, middle-aged mom, or a lazy good-for-nothing. I despise the loss of brain function I've suffered, as well as the slow drain of my creativity. I am truthfully quite bitter about the things my body can't seem to do now, that it used to be able to. I'm trying to get healthy, but the truth is I miss my cute, thin, fast-thinking self. Sometimes I despair that she is gone forever. Sometimes I hate the body I wake up in. And sometimes I even remember to forgive this poor vessel, with parts breaking down and misfiring, that has to function at a deficit all the time.

No comments:

Post a Comment